For all the new Mothers out there!

I'd like to take the time to 

share with all of you that read this,
my struggles with motherhood

Here's my story

When we first brought Alaiva home
I noticed a few things
First, motherhood is so.dang.hard.
I mean seriously!
I had just gone through major surgery
and was supposed to rest...
...with a newborn...
ha.

Secondly, I wasn't allowed to do anything
I mean NOTHING
for 6 whole weeks
no laundry
no dishes
no bending over
no lifting
or driving

The heaviest thing that I was allowed
to lift was Alaiva

I went crazy I tell you!
I felt suffocated,
trapped

My poor, poor husband put up with a lot
those few weeks
I mean A LOT

He had to do everything!
Cook,
Clean,
listen to me cry

Yeah, that's right...
I cried
a lot
in fact, it was every time he left the house
I was like a leaky faucet!

I'll be honest, most days I didn't even get out of bed
It was hard having
this little girl depend so much on me

She ate every 2 hours
so it felt like all I did was feed her
all day
(which meant that I wouldn't even get dressed...ugh)


It was during this time that I relied heavily
on the Gospel
I read scriptures, listened to talks and sang
to my sleeping little babe

It also helped that Thomas
made sure to get me out of the house.
Even if it was just to Walmart to walk around!
I felt less suffocated this way

I was determined not to let the baby blues get to me!
Slowly I went from taking showers and
getting ready for the day,
to cooking meals and
hanging out in the living room
instead of our bed
(It doesn't sound like much, but trust me, it was hard work!)

I write this because I want you to know
that if you are having similar problems,
you aren't alone!
And don't feel ashamed or
like you aren't a good mom!

Sometimes it seems like other
people just ease right into motherhood...
but trust me,
every one has adjustments at first!

Just remember:
Pray, read & sing
It saved my bacon!
It's all worth it :)
I mean, look at this face!

(5 Days Old)

Thanks for reading!
Hope it helped!






















 

The Birth Story :)

Ok, so I guess I have some explaining to do!

First, I stopped blogging because who am I kidding, I didn't have kids.

Second, I don't cook new or exciting things

and third, I'm not crafty!

But now we have a little bundle of joy :)

So here is her birth story!

My first contraction started at about 4 in the morning on January 6th 2014.
 Then 11 minutes later, then to 8 minutes
 and by 4:30 they were coming every 3 minutes.
So I woke Thomas up and said,
"It's probably nothing but we should probably head to the hospital!" 

So we packed up everything we thought we needed
 (which meant we forgot everything we did actually need)
and headed to the hospital!

On the drive there, Thomas and I were discussing whether we thought she was
coming today. He of course wanted her to come... But I was thinking of all the things
that weren't finished! I mean we had just moved! my whole house was
a disaster!

It was about 5 in the morning by the time we got to the hospital.
The nurses checked me out and said
 "It looks like you're having your baby today! You are dilated to a 4! We will take you to your room and get your epidural going!"
I was stunned... I thought, there is no way! She's two and a half weeks early!
Not to mention that I had a cold with a cough :(
But of course Thomas was extremely excited! He couldn't stop smiling!
By the time they took me to my room, I was in so much pain!! It felt like the contractions were coming every minute! Unfortunately, the anesthesiologist was with another patient so I had to wait...
We had been to the Hospital for about an hour and a half at this point and
 I was ready to kill someone if they didn't give me the juice soon!
The nurse thought that I was moving pretty fast so she checked me and I was dilated to a 9...
Holy Moly....
Thankfully at that moment my knight in green scrubs arrived!
He made no promises to get me fully numb,
but he worked diligently and thankfully I was finally out of pain!
I mean I was so far along that when he was sticking the needle in my back, I was pushing!
It was intense to say the least...

So I finally could think straight... a little...
When the anesthesiologist came back to check on me
he said "Are you doing ok? Are we friends now? I'm glad you're not making anymore threats!"
Yeah, apparently I had been saying that if he didn't come numb me soon,
I was gunna start throwing things!
Ha... oops... I don't remember that :)
(Don't judge until you feel the pain of being dilated to a 9!)

Well the bad thing about the epidural was that it slowed down my progress... Ugh
So we waited for awhile, which meant that I got to rest!

FINALLY after a few hours, my baby girl decided to start coming again!

The pushing wasn't bad at all
(I was so numb that you could have seriously cut off my leg and I wouldn't have known)
After I started pushing, My doctor noticed that she was face up and kind of stuck
so after trying to turn her around twice, my doctor decided that a
C-Section would be the best thing for us.
Since I had a fever that was climbing, and Alaiva was in distress,
Thomas and I decided that we would consent to the surgery

I was scared. I had never even entertained the thought of a C-Section!
I mean, this is the first time that I've ever even stayed at a hospital
and now I'm getting surgery?

...

My husband was wonderful and kept me sane.
He also gave me a blessing
Let me tell you, I cannot believe the calm that came over me
I knew everything would be ok
Thomas was emotional, my mom was crying
but I was feeling at ease and ready.

Can I just take a minute to gush about my husband?
The whole time we were in the hospital, he was nothing but supportive
he held my hand, fed me ice chips and tried taking my mind off the pain.
He even helped the nurse when it was time for me to push.
Giving me a blessing before my surgery was a wonderful experience
He gave me a whole new appreciation for the gospel and the Priesthood.

When they wheeled me down to the surgery room,
my doctor told me that I would receive a spinal tap,
and that Thomas would be able to sit in with me
after I was numbed

So in the room I went... The same anesthesiologist that I had before came in.
 He said "Ok, since your epidural worked so well, I'm just going to give you more."
I said, "I was told that I was going to get a spinal tap?"
"Who told you that?"
"My doctor, Dr. Jones"
"Well I'm the anesthesiologist and I'll do what I think is best."
His. Exact. Words.
So, I trusted him
Big, BIG mistake....

When my Doctor started the incision, I told him
"...Um, I kind of feel that..."
he said, "It should just be pressure."
and then I told him "No, I feel that!"
By this time, I can feel him moving Alaiva around
So he asked me, "Do you want to be put under?"
and I said "yes, yes!"
The pain was intense...
I felt like I couldn't breathe!
Before I went under, I remember them removing
Thomas from the room and my doctor asking my anesthesiologist
"Why isn't she numb?!"

Then, nothing.

While I was out, I will tell you what Thomas told me happened.
He was taken to a room with two nurses.
All of a sudden a little screaming girl was passed through the window.
All he could think of was, "Is that her?"
The nurses let him hold her for a minute,
then proceeded to show Thomas how to bathe her.

Thomas was so nervous and just overwhelmed with emotions
that all he could do was make jokes while they bathed her (surprise, surprise!)

Now back to me... 45 minutes later... :(

Before I came to, my consciousness was awake.
The first thing that I thought was, Where is my baby?
Where is Thomas?
Where am I?

Then my eyes opened, I saw Thomas holding this little bundle with hair
I couldn't believe it...
I was shaking so bad that I was scared of holding her.
But then he put her in my arms
and I just couldn't believe it...
I was just so stunned...

Then, I got mad.

I missed out on her first cries
I didn't get to see her when she came out
I didn't even get to HOLD her for a full 45 minutes

I felt robbed
In fact, when I first held her it was just well,
anti-climatic

I see all these wonderful and touching pictures of mothers seeing
their babies for the first time and I just
get so sad!

Nothing went as I thought it would and I guess I'll just
hope for the best with the next one!

The next day my doctor apologized profusely and told me that he had "words" with the anesthesiologist.
I knew it wasn't his fault so I just thanked him and smiled like it was no big deal.

January 6th was and IS the most wonderful day of my life
but I would have changed a few things....

I wont go into my recovery...
Just imagine being stabbed
and then not being able to speak for 3 days
and then having a cough to top it all off
yeah, it was all worth it though :)

 (her little face was bruised and swollen because she got stuck, poor thing)

Thanks for reading!
Hope it wasn't too boring (or whiny)
:)






























    

I am a Terrible Blogger...

We have been sooo busy lately! 

There is so much I want to catch up on and 

not enough patients to do it...

I may have been putting this off for awhile now!

:)

Lets start with my favorite!

DISNEYLAND!!!

We went March 30th through April 7th! 

It was such a blast! Thomas hadn't been 

since he was 5, so we were really excited 

to be able to go with each other! 

Alright... Bare with me because there are 

a lot of pictures from our trip! 

We had such a blast!

 Just so you know... It was extremely dark on that ride

Then they started flashing lights!

Don't judge me... haha

 I purposely hid my face this time....

 Baaahahahahahahaha!

 Once again... Don't judge me!

:)

 California Adventure!

 These two were best buds the whole trip!

Ashlynn wouldn't go on any rides

with anyone except Thomas!
Her first roller-coaster ever, was next to my sweet husband :)

(which left me all by myself *sigh*)

 Best. Moment. Ever.

I call this the "Husband Stealer"

 Eating at Goofy's Kitchen was Awesome!

Ha! We are so proud of our Mickey Ears :)

It was a wonderful trip and we were sad to leave!

So... We are planning another trip down there hopefully soon! 

Yay! :)  

It's Been Awhile...

Ok, Catch up time! 

So lets see... Lets start with January!

Thomas started school and is doing wonderful! 

Out of 60 kids in his Physics class he has the HIGHEST grade... 

That's right everyone... My Husband is suuuper smart. 

Marrying him was the only smart decision I've ever made haha...

Also, We painted our livingroom! Yay! 

Just one wall but still... 

That one wall has worked wonders!

Here are the before and after shots :)

This obviously is my part of my livingroom...

BEFORE!

AFTER! 

Don't you just love it?!

I am SOOOO incredibly happy that we (I) decided on red :)

And a BIG thanks to my Brother-in-Law Chance for painting!

Ok! So that is pretty much all that has happened

in January :)

Now! February...

Of course Valentine's day is pretty much the ONLY 

thing that happened in February...

I came home from work to a clean

house and a beautiful 

bouquet of flowers ;)

He is so sweet!

Not to mention that "Penny"

 also got me something

(my husband is super silly)

Those are the chocolates and

even a card from Penny... haha!

I also got a card with a $50 gift card in it to...

FOREVER 21!!!

My favorite store in the world!

My husband knows me so well!

Needless to say that card 

only lasted about 3 minutes.

We also went to Wingers with all 

of our usual friends!

It was a blast!

Then it was back to the Spicer's 

for some yummy cinnamon rolls :) 

It was by far the best 

Valentine's Day ever! 

Alright I think that is it! 

You'll be hearing more from us after

we come back from

DISNEYLAND!

WHOOOOOOOOOOOO!

30 days left!!

- The Lammers

A recap on December Events :)

Well December was pretty eventful... 

My Nephew Tyson turned 4... He's such a stud :) 

Then on the 18th, we celebrated a year of knowing each other 

Penny got declawed and spayed

And let me tell you... I am so much happier now! 

She cant climb up everything and is a much nicer kitty... Yay!

Thomas had 2 weeks off for Christmas break (which was good and bad)

So we saw a lot of each other...which means we played a LOT

of Zelda: Majora's Mask... 

Plus I got him Zelda: Skyward Sword for Christmas

So we wont be stopping anytime soon...

After all, when we got married I took him in nerdiness and in health.

We attended an awesome Ugly Sweater Christmas party at the Spicer's

And even though the guys dominated us in 2 rounds of 30 Seconds

 It was still super fun :)

These are a few of the pictures we took before the Party... Enjoy!

We had such a wonderful Christmas! 

I was super spoiled by my husband and lets face it, he got spoiled too.

We spent Christmas Eve with my family and Christmas day with his :)

But, we had our own Christmas morning!

I made puffed french toast

and I made Apple Cider Syrup to put on top

...Needless to say that was the BEST breakfast we've ever had. Ever.

It was a great first Christmas!

He was super excited to open presents...

So excited that he woke me up at 7 a.m.

:)

Merry Christmas!

From, The Lammers ;)